What his time spent with women offered was the opportunity to be embraced by reality, on the one hand, while negating it entirely on the other. To lose all contact with women was, in the end, to lose that connection. If you took away my career as a plastic surgeon, and the happy environment I’m living in, and threw me out into the world, with no explanation, and with everything stripped away – what in the world would I be? But still these days I’ve often wondered, Who in the world am I? And very seriously at that. I have a lot of friends, and have stayed healthy up till now. I’ve always been conscientious about my work, and I’ve never had any major problems with my clients. The world of plastic surgery can be pretty seedy, and there are some clinics that put out splashy advertising but do mediocre work. Maybe I shouldn’t say this, but I’m a pretty skilled surgeon. Graduated from the plastic surgery department of med school, worked first with my father as his assistant, then took over the clinic when his eyes started to go and he retired. “Up until now I’ve worked as a cosmetic surgeon and never had any doubts about it. He seemed to have missed the hint of sarcasm in my words. He nodded a couple of times, as if confirming this. “That is a difficult question,” Tokai said. “Who in the world am I? I’ve really been wondering about this,” he repeated.

I was a little late in noticing this, though.

I’ve never had this feeling up till now, and it makes me realize how incomplete I’ve been, as a person. The same emotion hasn’t changed at all in a thousand years. The deep sense of loss after you’ve met the woman you love, have made love, then said goodbye. While he didn’t dislike talking to people he knew well about things that mattered, he otherwise preferred to remain silent.īecause in the final analysis, the language we speak constitutes who we are as people

Murakami drive my car book